The guy who never was

Its been a while since I blogged but inspiration hit

I walk out of my hostel and its there
The place we stood together
I know you are gone
You disappeared a week ago
Yet somehow I find myself waiting for you to show up

Its been a week and a day
In the begging i pretended I dint notice
Pushed thoughts of you out of my head cause I had more important things to think about
But your absence became so obvious

Its like you left a hole
And I am no longer whole
Like you may have been my other perfect piece
My completion
Yet I know from my bottomless heart that I never will and never did love you
There is still a shape
An unknown polygon
Where you should be
Or where you where
More like where I wanted you to be

Because I can sit here an blog all I want
Buy when It comes to my emotions about your departure I don’t know whether to laugh or cry
I never needed you
You where always that down fall
So I’m happy your gone
Yet at the same time I can’t shake the feeling that I want you here
With me.

But since all contact is lost
I’m gonna let bygones be what they are
At let you stay gone
Sometimes I picture you coming back with an excuse
And I wonder if I could forgive you
Huh well I would have done the same thing.
I would have left you without a trace
Thanks for being the first person to leave me here
Actually you are the first person
And whether that was your plan or not
I’m not sure how i feel

I would like to say toche and call it a day
But I don’t think I’m okay with the way you left me hanging
I am not your baggage.
I wont be