Poetry

Showing myself (3): In real life

​The picture below is of a painting called Duality by Patricia Ariel.


“When there are so many lines to read… in between

So many words, phrases, sentences
Its easy to get lost in the unsaid
To connect dots that were never there
And I…
I become a conspiracy theorist when it comes to love and abandonment
So everything you say
And all you leave unsaid
Every smile
Wink, lick
Every meme
Emoji and gif
I categorize
I memorize
I analyse

I am like your magical machine
I take in everything
Your body language
Your language
Your silence
It all speaks to me

Speach in parables can be your down fall
When you eat, breathe and live words
They can kill you, hard.
Its hard to believe what anyone says they say the mean when you dont even believe the things you say
I mean
The abstract world is beautiful and deadly.
It is what you make it
And thats the problem
The medley of space, matter and silence without time
Creats gods of deception in my mind
I can be what i want to be there
I can make you fall love with me there

But here
I do fail
And you do fall
But time screws both of us over.

Thats why.
Thats why i’d rather spend my days
In an endless daze
Reading mind maps in my brain as i twirl my braids
Fighting in my mind, winning battles i couldnt count as victories in real life.

So in real life
(Whatever that means)
I am hidden
Unless you find me”

*mutheu*

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